The Wedding Reception
Introduction:
Weddings are a happy occasion and should not be restricted by undue formality but at the same time there are certain customs that are expected and should be observed. Plan the occasion with your Toastmaster so that everyone knows what is expected of them and what they have to do, then relax and enjoy the day.
The Receiving Line:
Traditionally the introduction of one family and their guests to the other family, who may never have met. It was customary to greet the guests on arrival but due to photographs now taking much of the time it is now more usual to have the receiving line prior to taking places for the wedding breakfast. (Break-fast is correct because the Bride & Groom were required to "Fast" before the ceremonies) The Bride's Mother then Father come first followed by the Grooms mother and Father. The Bride & Groom come last so the guests can congratulate them and wish them well. Always at weddings, ladies come first. The toast master may announce the guests by name if required and time permits. Allow at least 10 minutes for each 50 guests. If a formal line is not possible the parents (especially the Brides mother) should circulate among the guests. Bridesmaids, Ushers and Best Man should not be included in the line.
Taking Places:
The Toastmaster will announce the Hosts (parents) to the top table and then announce the Bride & Groom and escort them to their places.
Grace:
The Toastmaster will ask everyone to remain standing and introduce the person who is to say grace. Toastmasters are frequently asked to say a grace, they have a selection of formal and less formal Graces.
Announcements:
After asking everyone to be seated the Toastmaster will make any announcements that are required. The wine and meal will follow without unnecessary interruption.
Cutting the Cake:
If the cake is to be served with the coffee the cake cutting ceremony will be introduced by the Toastmaster at the end of the desserts. Frequently the cake is not served until the evening so the ceremony is left until after the coffee and toast wines have been served and just prior to the speeches.
Speeches & Toasts:
The Toastmaster will introduce the speakers. There are usually three speeches and toasts. Traditionally only Men speak at Weddings but no hard and fast rules now apply.
First Toast to the Bride & Groom:
Normally proposed by the father of the bride or a close family friend:-
A/ Welcome everyone on behalf of his wife and himself,
B/ Thank everyone for coming to the occasion,
C/ Welcome his new son-in law into the family,
D/ Tell a little about his daughter,
E/ Ask everyone to stand and raise their glasses and drink a toast to the Bride & Groom.
Second Toast to the Bridesmaids:
This toast is proposed by the Groom. He should also include the following:-
A/ Thank his father-in-law for the toast and the welcome to the family as well as the wedding feast,
B/ Thank everyone for coming to the ceremony,
C/ Thank everyone for their gifts and good wishes,
D/ Thank his Bride for saying yes,
E/ Thank the ushers and his best man
F/ Thank the bridesmaids for their help to his wife
G/ Propose a toast to the bridesmaids. (Ladies and Gentlemen will you please stand, raise your glasses and join me in a toast to the Bridesmaids)
Presents:
After proposing the toast the Groom can ask his bride to stand up and help him give out any gifts and flowers. This is the ideal time for the bride to say a few words if she wishes without the formality of an introduction.
Third Toast (to the parents) Parents and our Hosts:
The best man proposes this toast after replying to the toast on behalf of the bridesmaids. He should thank the Groom for inviting him to be best man. He may then become a little anecdotal about his past association with the Groom but any remarks must be harmless and in good taste and able to be shared by everyone. He should conclude by thanking the hosts on behalf of the guests for the hospitality and wedding breakfast and propose a toast to the "Parents and our Host".
Retire:
When all the toasts and speeches have been concluded the Toastmaster will end the formalities and then ask the bride & groom to retire and escort them from the room.
Summary:
Please remember that theses notes are only guide lines and can be altered or ignored to suit the wishes of the Bride & Groom and the parents. It is your day and the main concern of everyone involved is to make your day extra special and memorable for you. Try not to become too tied up with the protocol of the occasion but to make it a happy family day. Enjoy it, its a once in a lifetime day. I hope these few notes will be of help to you planning your BIG DAY.
For more Help contact:
Peter D. Vincent
Fellow of the National Association of Toastmasters, Member of the Northern Guild of Toastmasters
Ferrers House, 16 Gaddum Road, Bowdon, Cheshire
Phone/Fax:- 0161 928 0484